News Briefs

News you can use all day

Bennie-the-Rat wants to have fun south of the border, if you know what I mean and I think you do.

  • The Worlds Most Successful Book Tour® – Staff-banging serial-adulterer Newticles is firing his staff, you know, to control costs and to prepare for the Big Choice Convention:

    “We think that a big part of how we succeed is getting back to core Gingrich, which is a focus on big ideas and positive solutions…”

    Back to the core Gingrich? That involves kneepads, right? (Politico)

  • We hate him, we really hate him - The Willard 2.0 is a stunning success! In just the very few weeks from roll-out, 52% of the country hates him, but none as much as the moderates and independents. (Mother Jones)
  • ¡Geraldo! weeps for thee - What with all the attention being paid to hoodies-owners being gunned-down in the streets, it was only a matter of time until the NRA made a hoodie with a concealed gun pouch. (NRA Store)

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 28th, 2012 at 7:56 am by Tengrain and is filed under snark. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

7 Responses to “News Briefs”

  1. SteveC: March 28th, 2012 at 8:33 am

    succeed & Gingrich????? How bad does he have to get slapped in the face by the American public? He cant even win over the conservatives and has a ZERO chance with moderates and liberals.

    Its over, not that he ever had a chance, he’s to damn obnoxious for even his own party.

  2. tommyspoon: March 28th, 2012 at 8:53 am

    Oh, Steve. This was never about winning the nomination, much less the presidency. No, this whole thing was about raising Gingrich’s speaking fees and book advances. He’s a grifter, much like his current wife.

  3. Pharmakeus Ubik: March 28th, 2012 at 11:29 am

    Getting to the core Gingrich involves rubber boots, rubberized aprons, and flensing tools. It would be better to just hand him over to a Japanese whaling ship. What remains is a reedy pith suitable for oboe, English horn, and shehnai mouth pieces.

  4. Bruce388: March 28th, 2012 at 12:30 pm

    It appears a muchacho bonito has caught Benny’s eye.

  5. fitley: March 28th, 2012 at 7:27 pm

    So the pube encrusted toilet cake Newt Gingrich is throwing in the sperm towel. Awww. See you at your next book signing pudgey.

  6. Tengrain: March 28th, 2012 at 7:42 pm

    Fitley

    Welcome to MPS, it is good to have you with us.

    We prefer the term Splash Towel, but otherwise you have a perfect score.

    Regards,

    Tengrain

  7. C Montgomery Burns: March 28th, 2012 at 8:08 pm

    Fanned and Faved.
    Said and Done.
    Over and Out.

    Don’t let the door hitcha in the ass.

    Divorced papers to be filed August 30.

    Time for number…what, 7 or 8?