When the worst writer in the country writes on sexism…
…can sexism be far behind?
Yes, today Richard Cohen The Worst Writer in AmericaTM decided to ponder the question, Why are there no female Tiger Woods, ie, sex scandals. And being Richard Cohen, well, his answers were truly, awe inspiringly terrible:
- “The first guess is that women are simply smarter than men. Say what you will about Woods, it’s not his wholesome image that has suffered, it’s his standing as a sentient being. A person with the wit of a mosquito knows better than to leave a voicemail message on a mistress’ phone or to text women who, from the angelic looks of them, would sell their own dear mothers for a chance to appear on Inside Edition. Few women are that stupid. Few men aren’t.”
- “The other possibility that strikes me is that women seem not to have the evolutionary urge to couple with cheaply dressed strangers. They have a stronger need to mother — to have a child and then raise that child.”
- “… women more than men link sex to love and commitment. I’m not saying that all of them do or all of them do all the time. I’m just saying that there seems to be few women who behave as Tiger Woods did. Even women who have no moral compunction against multiple affairs draw the line at a number somewhat below Tiger’s.”
- “But it could be that the urge to get closer to cocktail waitresses and denizens of dimly lit hotel lounges is in some way linked to the drive to conquer, to prevail — to succeed. It could explain why all this time into the Age of Feminism, years after women were liberated, women make up less than 20 percent of Congress and only 3 percent of those top CEOs.”
- “The reason the Glass Ceiling has not broken is that women have other priorities — maintaining relationships and being a mother. This is the way it is, and this is the way it has always been. As any of Tiger Woods’s cocktail waitresses could tell him, Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose.”
But the larger point being that Richard Cohen The Worst Writer in AmericaTM knows women. He understands women. It is rumored he might even have seen a woman once, and now he speaks for women. In French, ’cause, you know, it’s the language of love.
So let’s recap, shall we:
- Men are stupid and likely to get caught — which implies to my mind that women are crafty.
- Babies. Rhymes with rabies. They want them. Babies, that is.
- Even if women are going to cheat, they will not do it with as many people as men would, because they are wired for commitment — while men are not. Women don’t have urges, I guess is his point.
- Women would cheat (more?), but they are not aggressive enough, and this is why there are so few female leaders in business and in politics.
- Women speak French, cause you know, it’s a woman’s language, the language of love.
What a moron!
All sweeping generalizations are false.
“…women seem not to have the evolutionary urge to couple with cheaply dressed strangers.” Uh, weren’t there about a dozen of them women critters to only one Tiger Woods?
But in regards to Cohen being the country’s worst writer, I’ve got two words – Cal Thomas.
Thanks for reading that so I didn’t have to.
Is it just me or does he appear to have a black eye?
It’s been photoshopped. He is also missing a tooth. Rgds, TG
Cohen’s the worst writer? Did Tom “Tipping Point” Friedman make the move to India?
Doughy Pantload could give either or both a waddle for their money.
Pharmakeus Ubik – If you have an infinite number of monkeys and an infinite amount of time, you get the work of Shakespeare, or so they say. One monkey, ten minutes = Liberal Fascism. You nailed him.
Regards,
Tengrain
Time for the Boychik to Give. It. Up.
Damn. Just damn. After reading my blogs today, I just freaking despair.
Did he consider the women who were playing hide the salami on the side with Tiger? I don’t see a link with love and commitment there. Just fucking saying. He’s a tool. He probably only knows where to put “it” if his female companion has a big arrow painted on her abdomen.
Pissed -
I think it is beyond his comprehension that women ever want sex. But then again, imagine how many times that burnin’ burnin’ hunk-o-love has probably ever gotten laid, and I think you will find the root definition of “getting lucky.” But I’m only guessing.
Regards,
Tengrain
I think maybe Jesus’s General and he went out for drinks before he wrote that and he didn’t get that JG was being, you know, funny. No mention of mason jars, but still.
Why you gotta pick on dolphins, ‘Grain? They do have their own language and are probably as smart as us. I’d rather hold a conversation with any dolphin off the street than Cohen!
Tommyspoon -
I’m praising the dolphin for being smarter than that particular human, and I look forward to our eventual dolphin overlords as the continents sink beneath the waves, and Kevin Costner is heralded as a genius for Waterworld.
Regards,
Tengrain
But wait, he left out mention of his sexual harassment incident! I wonder why…