Mock, Paper, Scissors » 12 Days of MPS

Bad Ads, cont.

Posted by Tengrain Tuesday, December 18th, 2012

And doesn’t she look like she just got a Hoover?

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Mr. C. Montgomery Burns)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Badvertising | 5 Comments »

Bad Ideas, cont.

Posted by Tengrain Saturday, November 10th, 2012

This reminds me: we need to start begging our Poet Laureate Mountjoy to do the 12 Days of MPS this holiday season!

Put your pleas in the comments. Mounty is a softie underneath his über-snarky exterior.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Mr. C. Montgomery Burns)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Bad Ideas | 6 Comments »

Willard and the “Binders Full of Women”

Posted by Tengrain Wednesday, October 17th, 2012

Just sayin’.

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, sexism, Willard | 3 Comments »

You cannot make this up

Posted by Tengrain Tuesday, February 21st, 2012

The Death of the Media

BuzzFeed

There are no editors anymore.

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Death of the Media, Frothy, Wingnuttia, Xristian Xraxies, You Can't Make This Up | 9 Comments »

Looks like Iowa is…

Posted by Tengrain Tuesday, January 3rd, 2012

…a frothy mix of lube and fecal matter.

MPS salutes notable theocrat and fetus-jar impresario Rick Santorum as the banner carrier of the GOP (and repressed sex-fiends, abortion-seeking false Xristians, adulterer-shielding false-Xristians, and corrupt DC insiders).

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, 2012 Goat Rodeo, Frothy | 13 Comments »

Lumps of coal next year

Posted by Tengrain Tuesday, December 27th, 2011

Here’s a round-up of tweets from unhappy people who didn’t get what they wanted for Christmas. The thing that is notable here are the number of people who wanted Apple products and didn’t get them. There’s not a single person who was longing for Android (and didn’t get it, I suppose). So a Kindle is not equal to an iPad in the eyes of these beholders, and that is what is known as brand recognition.

(BuzzFeed via Daring Fireball)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Technology | 5 Comments »

Gah! Bachmann-the-Nut…

Posted by Tengrain Monday, December 26th, 2011

…sends us a video X-mas card:

The homunculus gathered some of her face-sucker hatchlings from the baby-mill around, but with 25 of them she isn’t sure who they are, but thankfully they remember, sort of! On Dancer, on Dasher, on Donner, on, um, who the hell are you? But who’s missing?

Perhaps Marcus was out putting up twinkle lights? Dancing a Pas de Deux with some of the Sugar Plums? Getting some elves into trouble? Who can say!

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, 2012 Goat Rodeo, Bachmann the Nutjobber | 5 Comments »

Happy Hols

Posted by Tengrain Saturday, December 24th, 2011

Scissorheads –

You’re the the web’s incorrigible band of spitballers^®. I’m just so grateful that you call Mock, Paper, Scissors your home away from home.

I wish I could thank each of you individually, but know that in my heart of hearts, I always liked you best.

Regards,

Tengrain

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, The Small Print | 19 Comments »

What Charlie Pierce said

Posted by Tengrain Saturday, December 24th, 2011

Just read his Christmas piece in Esquire. I wish I wrote it.

Posted in 12 Days of MPS | 2 Comments »

and the cat wins the gelt!

Posted by Tengrain Saturday, December 24th, 2011

–Tengrain

Posted in 12 Days of MPS | 6 Comments »

On the 11th day of XMas…

Posted by Tengrain Friday, December 23rd, 2011

That’s a lot of giftwrapping.

(hat tip: Scissorhead NYCEdges)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Badvertising | 7 Comments »

On the Tenth Day of Xmas

Posted by Tengrain Thursday, December 22nd, 2011

I’m good, but no one has offered to bronze my condoms.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Deborah)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Bad Ideas, Badvertising | 4 Comments »

The only Christmas video you will ever need

Posted by Tengrain Thursday, December 22nd, 2011

Posted in 12 Days of MPS | 3 Comments »

On the Nineth Day of XMas…

Posted by Tengrain Wednesday, December 21st, 2011

A bedtime log ride.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Skinny-D)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Badvertising | 7 Comments »

On the Eighth Day of Xmas…

Posted by Tengrain Tuesday, December 20th, 2011

Lady, I think that slip might be used, if you know what I mean, and I think you do. Not that there’s anything wrong with Santa exploring his more, um, glamorous side.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Mr. C. Montgomery Burns)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Badvertising | 2 Comments »

On the Seventh Day of XMas…

Posted by Tengrain Monday, December 19th, 2011

Oh yeah: Bacon-flavored lube exists. Don’t try to re-gift this for Hannukah.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Deborah)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Bad Ideas, Badvertising | 10 Comments »

On the Sixth Day of XMas…

Posted by Tengrain Sunday, December 18th, 2011

The police never found his remains, yet always the gracious lady the mincemeat pie she gave them for trying to find her husband was lovely.

(Hat Tip: Scissorhead Dimitrios)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Bad Ideas, Badvertising | 7 Comments »

On the Fifth Day of XMas…

Posted by Tengrain Saturday, December 17th, 2011

Five golden sperms!

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Deborah)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Bad Ideas, Badvertising | 8 Comments »

The XMas Card You’ve Always Wanted

Posted by Tengrain Saturday, December 17th, 2011

What Gropey McPizza doesn’t tell you is that the fire behind him? That’s Hell. I also like the way that Gloria pre-emptively takes his hand before Black Walnut gropes someone.

(Hat tip: Scissorhead Mr. C. Montgomery Burns)

Posted in 12 Days of MPS, Black Walnut | 4 Comments »