…we offer this reprise showing:
UPDATE: Great minds think alike: One of the Internet Blogger Hall-o-Fame greatest stylists and a personal hero of mine, Jurassic Pork also is calling Chimpy’s Lieberry a collection of pop-up books. Also, too: What JP Said.
Jonathan Chait at the NYMag: Yes, George W. Bush Was a Terrible President, and No, He Wasn’t Smart
George W. Bush Library Set to Open at SMU
The Chimpy McStagger reading room…”will preserve for history the important decisions made by President Bush during his presidency and will embody and carry on the values of President and Mrs. Bush.”
I think that’s a long-winded way of saying that there will be an open bar and a pharmacy.
The so-called smart Bush Jeb (married to a notrorious tax cheat, father of an addict, an anger-management candidate, and a third kid who likes to have under-aged sex in public) is proud of his brother, Chimpy whom he says has no opinions.
This might be the first truthful thing a Bush has ever said on record.
“I don’t think there’s any Bush baggage at all. I love my brother, I’m proud of his accomplishments, I love my dad, I am proud to be a Bush.”
–The Smart Bush
(I think we just found Peggy Noonan’s missing Porter at the airport hotel in Pittsburg.)
…will be awarded to The Smart Bush–you know, the Bush married to the tax evader, with the addict daughter, the anger-management son, and the other son noted for underaged public sex– who will be on all the Sunday Talkies.
Hasn’t Bush crime family done enough to us?
Barney has gone:
Laura and I are sad to announce that our Scottish Terrier, Barney, has passed away. The little fellow had been suffering from lymphoma and after twelve and a half years of life, his body could not fight off the illness.
Barney and I enjoyed the outdoors. He loved to accompany me when I fished for bass at the ranch. He was a fierce armadillo hunter. At Camp David, his favorite activity was chasing golf balls on the chipping green.Barney guarded the South Lawn entrance of the White House as if he were a Secret Service agent. He wandered the halls of the West Wing looking for treats from his many friends. He starred in Barney Cam and gave the American people Christmas tours of the White House. Barney greeted Queens, Heads of State, and Prime Ministers. He was always polite and never jumped in their laps.
Barney was by my side during our eight years in the White House. He never discussed politics and was always a faithful friend. Laura and I will miss our pal.
My condolences to the Bush family.
(TPM)
Whoopsie! Germany’s Der Spiegel published an obituary Sunday for former U.S. President George H.W. Bush:
In it, the magazine’s New York correspondent described Bush as “a colorless politician” whose image only improved when it was compared to the later presidency of his son, George W. Bush.
(AP)
“George P. Bush, a nephew of former President George W. Bush and a son of former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, has filed paperwork with the Texas Ethics Commission, seemingly in preparation for a run for local or statewide office.”
This is Jeb’s boy (one of GHWB’s “little brown ones”), the one with anger-management problems. Not the one with the drug issues, or the one who liked to have underaged sex in public.
Indeed, George W. Bush, now 66, has spent the past few years living as invisibly as possible, working diligently on his golf game at the Brook Hollow Golf Club in Dallas, showing up at a Rangers baseball game, or being spotted eating a steak in one of his favorite restaurants. While the rest of the world judges his years in office, he’s taken up painting, making portraits of dogs and arid Texas landscapes. “I find it stunning that he has the patience to sit and take instruction and paint,” says a former aide.
Why do I imagine Chimpy’s portraits must look like those Keane, big-eyed children pictures? Or maybe clowns? Clowns with big eyes? Wild Turkey bottles with big eyes? Yes, I think that’s it.
From Taegan Goddard’s Political Wire:
Bush Viewed More Favorably Than Romney
Dallas Morning News: “For all the talk about whether Mitt Romney should distance himself from George W. Bush — and the policies of the last GOP White House — a new survey shows that the former president actually has better favorability ratings than the Republican nominee.”
The most recent Bloomberg poll shows Bush with a 46% to 49% favorable rating as compared to Romney’s 43% to 50%.
That’s quite an accomplishment, Willard! How do you plan to celebrate? Oh, that’s right: don’t drink, don’t smoke…
“We know what politics is like. We know that, you know, people love to blame somebody else. That’s just a fact of life in politics…I think George makes an easy target.”
–Pickles Bush
“Mitt Romney’s campaign staff in Boston got an unexpected pep talk this morning when former President George W. Bush and his wife Laura stopped by.”
You’d think by now that Chimpy and Pickles would know that they have been flushed down the memory hole.
(ABC News)
Gawker reports that amongst the many decapitated heads in scenes in a Game of Thrones segment, one is of Chimpy. Of course, all of Wingnuttia is up in arms over this, Hollywood conspiracies, etc., but the producers have a calm and reasonable explanation: they rent these heads in bulk because (it seems) that they have a lot of scenes with head-on-pikes, and they don’t know what the props guys are going to get in their box.
This feel-good scene will be removed from future editions of the DVD, so I better run out and buy it today…
Anyway, Gawker has a picture of Chimpy’s head on a pike, so at least one item on my bucket list is now complete.
(Gawker)
Chimpy McStagger looking neither preznintial or bright. So, good job!
Pickles VonStrap-on, who looks sort of Xanaxed, so good job for the artist for capturing her essence. And of course it reminds me of my favorite bit of Pickles snark at the holidays when someone referred to her as The Velveteen Pickle.
Update 1: Twolf over at Dependable Renegade has, um, enhanced the portraits as only he can. Be sure to check out the background of each. Subtle, but so freakin’ funny.
(TPM)
The only man in the country who could not run for the GOP nomination is Jeb Bush. After his brother Chimpy screwed the pooch and set fire to the family franchise while making fart noises with his armpit, Jeb (allegedly the smart one) knows that with his now-cursed last name that his much loathed mother Babs-the-Impaler would have an easier time becoming the Betty Crocker Mother of the Year with her recipe for pickled-fetus-in-jars before he would ever be considered as a viable contender for the White House. Such is life.
Just a brief walk down memory lane with Jebby (and yes, the Bush Crime Family really does call him that) reminds us that he played a significant role inserting himself into the Terri Schiavo Drama of a few years back; which of course followed the strange case of how his idiot dry-drunk brother Chimpy became president following a vote count fiasco in the state that Jebby governed. Not that there is any connection.
We are also reminded that Jebby’s own family drama are always amusing in their own way. Let’s recall the good times:
Anyway, so imagine the sadness that this outstanding member, the smart one, of the Bush Crime Family must feel today as he gave his endorsement to Willard 2.0 and then ordered the Wingnuts to shut up and get in line. After all, if he, the Dauphin of Bushlandia, could swallow his pride, so should the mouth breathers:
“Congratulations to Governor Mitt Romney on his win last night and to all the candidates for a hard fought, thoughtful debate and primary season,” Bush said in a statement released by his office on Wednesday morning. “Primary elections have been held in thirty-four states, and now is the time for Republicans to unite behind Governor Romney and take our message of fiscal conservatism and job creation to all voters this fall. I am endorsing Mitt Romney for our Party’s nomination.”
We hope that by endorsing Willard, Jebby’s supporters will finally stop moving forward with 7-dimensional chess moves about how he will end up with the nomination by jumping in at the last moment, or through some sort of machination at a brokered convention.
Of course given Willard’s complete lack of core convictions and a willingness to say anything to get elected, it will be pretty much a Bush Crime Family operation, anyway, so Poppy and Babs-the-Impaler will feel triumphant yet once again.
…is smarter than the real thing.
Introducing the Chimpy McStagger animatron. Notice how the other presidents are, um, well, er, notice them.
Happy Presidents’ Day – it’s our Democracy, enjoy it!
A brokered convention: Jeb Bush vs. Sarah Palin
PLEASE!
(The Hill — Read the comments for shits and giggles. Seriously, I died laughing. )
On this date in 2005, Scooter Libby was indicted in the Valerie Plame Affair and resigned from Chimpy McStagger’s administration.
Of course, later Chimpy commuted his sentence, and thus Scooter never spent a day in prison as a felon.
You have to give the brain trust in Congress some credit for this incredibly dumb idea:
Here’s how it would work: Foreigners plunk down at least $500,000 on a house in the U.S., and get a visa. The visa wouldn’t allow them to work here — they’d have to have a work permit for that. But they could live here, as long as they own the house.
Let’s see, what foreign nationals would want to buy an expensive house to live here but have no other rights? Perhaps, oh, I dunno, Drug Lords, War Criminals, Mafia Chieftans, overthrown dictators…
“…no new Texans!”
(Someone on Twitter said it last night, but I didn’t write down who it was. I thought it should be illustrated.)
Sweet baby Jeebus, she must have OD’d on Sara Lee or something to bring on this sort of fever dream:
Doesn’t she know that the official response is in the memory hole?
…if this kid is ever put up for adoption.
(Hat tip: Scissorhead Bruce388)
Remember the third item in this morning’s News Briefs about Waterhead Jeb not getting too close to President Carebear during their joint appearance? Me Neither!
But anyway, Obama got in some licks:
Obama made no mention in his speech about Bush’s brother, former President George W. Bush—whom he’s frequently criticized. “Aside from being the former governor of the state, Jeb is best known as the brother of …” Obama said, with a long pause. “Marvin Bush.”
The president added, “Apparently the rest of the family also did some work back in Washington, back in the day.”
The NYTimes has a fascinating story of how Fox News Chairman Roger Ailes might have/probably settled a wrongful termination lawsuit with Judith Regan to cover-up that he requested that she lie during the investigation of Bernie Kerik to be the first head of Homeland Security.
There’s no hero in this story. Regan had an affair with Kerik, Ailes asked her to lie about it to protect his pal Rudy Giuliani. Later when HarperCollins fired her, she threatened to go public, and then Fox (parent company to HarperCollins) gave her a big settlement.
Oh, and in the tradition of all Wingnuttia, Regan taped the phone call from Ailes. For the record, Ailes used to be a political advisor to Dick Nixon. And thus it is proven once again: there is no honor amongst thieves.
(NYTimes)
The nominally smarter member of the Lint Twins, Barbara Bush, has broken ranks with Chimpy and decided to support marriage equality:
“I’m Barbara Bush, and I’m a New Yorker for marriage equality,” she says in a 22-second video released Monday by the Human Rights Campaign, a group that lobbies for equal treatment for gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgenders.
“New York is about fairness and equality,” she says in the video. “And everyone should have the right to marry the person that they love.”
Well, better late than never, but too bad it comes two years AFTER being a first daughter when it might have more impact.
The Living Museum of ’80s Power Suspenders gets the exclusive scoop on Babs-the-Impaler and her mysterious ways of teaching Abstinence to her young son, Chimpy, thus influencing an entire generation of Snowflake babies.
(Politico)
(You can click here to see it without the ad that blocks the translation.)
George W. Bush’s pro-life stance solidified when he was a teenager in Texas — after his mother suffered a devastating miscarriage and showed him the fetus in a jar, the former president said in an extraordinary interview that airs tonight.
“She said to her teenage kid, ‘Here’s the fetus,’ ” the shockingly candid Bush told NBC’s Matt Lauer, gesturing as if he were holding the jar during the TV chat, a DVD of which The Post exclusively obtained.
“There’s no question that affected me, a philosophy that we should respect life,” said the former president, who had to drive his distraught mother to the hospital at the time.
“…and Jeb’s ain’t been th’ same since,” Chimpy guffawed.
There’s a reason we call her Babs-the-Impaler.
(NYPost via Watertiger)
Now do you believe in evolution? OK, devolution?
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