Mock, Paper, Scissors

Dedicated to XristiM

Folks –

My Blog Against Theocracy tradition requires that I reprise a post from one of the original Scissorheads, Xristim who passed away in December 2006 from cancer; I miss that woman every day, she was one of a kind –as are all the Scissorheads. XristiM was a Christian, but she was wary of the Religious Right, and was strictly in favor of the Separation of Church and State. This is from a comment she posted in November, 2006.

CHANGE OF ADDRESS
Dedicated to the Absolutely Sure of Absolutely Everything
From Someone Who Isn’t
(c) XristiM 1998-2006

Into their Lazarus mouths they pop
God like round peppermint lozenges,
and with their resurrected teeth
grind Him small,
roll the bits with their tongues,
flooding them with saliva and
the exhalations of digestion.
Then they amble forth
to perform the work for which
they have anointed themselves
and each other,
breathing the judgment of an angry God strongly
into the nostrils of others.

We can hear them at a distance,
from close enough can detect the stench
of self-righteousness.
And a wary eye can detect them in our midst,
with coats that show glossy fronts,
but on their backs,
hidden from their view
and from ours
unless we trouble ourselves to look,
reveal scraps and patches
like bandages over festering sores.

We may protest, draw back in distaste,
alarmed to have God thrust upon us
smelling so pungently of mint
and the charnel house,
but they are relentless in pursuit
of fleeing souls.
They paralyze us with their certainty
that God lives in their mouths.

For myself, I think the God has filed
His change of address:
He resides
not in the mouth, but in the heart.

#BlogAgainstTheocracy

Yikes! Another day of this? Has Tengrain gone off his nut? (D’uh, you have to ask?) How can he do this to us? Well, it’s E-Z, just watch! And today’s theocrats are probably the easiest of the bunch to guess.

Our excitement-building, Blog Against Theocracy theocratic contest continues… let us recap the rules, shall we?

Here’s the dealio: each day through the conclusion of the BAT on Sunday, we will post a graphic of a few theocrats; if, by the conclusion of the BAT you have correctly identified all the theocrats, your name will go into a random drawing to win your choice of theocrat’s graphic! Huzzah!

Place your answer in the comments – you must identify all eight theocrats, not just the two newest. No special rules today for noted fluent Pig Latinist Scissorhead Mac from Oregon, except that his answers should rhyme.

So, without further ado, here are all the theocrats to date:

	Theocrat	Clue	How to Spot in the Wild
Theocrat 1		This former GOP Presidential Candidate is noted for getting calls from God on his cell phone.	Eating roadkill.
Theocrat 2		This theocrat does not believe in evolution, only in “animals that he allows to live.”	Getting his back waxed, or fighting Kareen Abul Jabbar.
Theocrat 3		This theocrat has a world-wide radio empire, and received his degree in Psychology from the University of Spoiled Children.	Beating children.
Theocrat 4		This theocrat believes that God punished New Orleans for a Gay Pride parade.	In Israel, trying to nudge The Rapture.
Theocrat 5		This theocrat, when not running away from his record, is perpetually running for GOP President and is deeply mistrusted by all other theocrats.	Bitch-slapping rappers on airplanes, strapping dogs to the roof of his car.
Theocrat 6		This theocrat, also a former GOP presidential candidate, blames Haitians for their devastating earthquake, saying that God was punishing them for taking away the property rights of others when they broke free from slavery.	Weight lifting.
Theocrat 7		This theocrat says that God has her crown in heaven. Noted for being Maggie Gallagher’s shower-nozzle masturbation fetish object.	Filming soft-core porn, or finger-banging.
Theocrat 8		This Hawaiian shirt-wearing theocrat claims to be nonpolitical.	In Uganda working behind the scenes to legalize killing gays and lesbians, or in California working to deny gays and lesbians civil rights.

For more information about the Blog Against Theocracy, please visit the website. If you would like to pick up BAT badges for your blog, they are available on my Flickr page. These are the same theocrats you will find in the contest!

Ho! Ho! Ho! Our excitement-building, pre-Blog Against Theocracy theocratic contest continues… let us recap the rules, shall we?

Here’s the idea: each day through the conclusion of the BAT on Sunday, we will post a graphic of a few theocrats; if, by the conclusion of the BAT you have correctly identified all the theocrats, your name will go into a random drawing to win your choice of theocrat’s graphic! Woot! Woot!

Place your answer in the comments – today you must identify all six theocrats, not just the two newest… Scissorhead Mac from Oregon gets a special rule today: he must list his answers today in Pig-Latin. Okay kidding. But it would be fun if he did.

So, without further ado, here are all the theocrats to date:

	Theocrat	Clue	How to Spot in the Wild
Theocrat 1		This former GOP Presidential Candidate is noted for getting calls from God on his cell phone.	Eating roadkill.
Theocrat 2		This theocrat does not believe in evolution, only in “animals that he allows to live.”	Getting his back waxed, or fighting Kareen Abul Jabbar.
Theocrat 3		This theocrat has a world-wide radio empire, and received his degree in Psychology from USC.	Beating children.
Theocrat 4		This theocrat believes that God punished New Orleans for a Gay Pride parade.	In Israel, trying to nudge The Rapture.
Theocrat 5		This theocrat, when not running away from his record, is perpetually running for President and is deeply mistrusted by all other theocrats	Bitch-slapping rappers on airplanes, strapping dogs to the roof of his car.
Theocrat 6		This theocrat, also a former GOP presidential candidate, blames Haitians for their devestating earthquake, saying that God was punishing them for taking away the property rights of others when they broke free from slavery.	Weight lifting.

For more information about the Blog Against Theocracy, please visit the website. If you would like to pick up BAT badges for your blog, they are available on my Flickr page. These are the same theocrats you will find in the contest!

Remember yesterday when we kicked off our excitement-building, pre-Blog Against Theocracy by introducing a contest? Me neither!

Here’s the idea: each day through the conclusion of the BAT on Sunday, we will post a graphic of a few theocrats; if, by the conclusion of the BAT you have correctly identified all the theocrats, your name will go into a random drawing to win your choice of theocrat’s graphic! Woot! Woot!

Place your answer in the comments – today you must identify all four theocrats, not just the two newest.

So, without further ado, here are yesterday’s and today’s theocrats:

	Theocrat	Clue	How to Spot in the Wild
Theocrat 1		This former GOP Presidential Candidate is noted for getting calls from God on his cell phone.	Eating roadkill.
Theocrat 2		This theocrat does not believe in evolution, only in “animals that he allows to live.”	Getting his back waxed, or fighting Kareen Abul Jabbar.
Theocrat 3		This theocrat has a world-wide radio empire, and received his degree in Psychology from the University of Spoiled Children.	Beating children.
Theocrat 4		This theocrat believes that God punished New Orleans for a Gay Pride parade.	In Israel, trying to nudge-on The Rapture.

For more information about the Blog Against Theocracy, please visit the website. If you would like to pick up BAT badges for your blog, they are available on my Flickr page. These are the same theocrats you will find in the contest!

To get everyone excited and thinking about the Blog Against Theocracy, we’re having a contest! With an actual prize!

For more information about the Blog Against Theocracy, please visit the website. If you would like to pick up BAT badges for your blog, they are available on my Flickr page. These are the same theocrats you will find in the contest!

Each day between now and the end of the BAT, I will give you a clue about a theocrat or two. If you identify all the theocrats, I will put your name in a random drawing and the winner will win a signed original piece of art of the theocrat of your choice from the collection!

Here are today’s theocrats:

	Theocrat	Clue	How to Spot in the Wild
Theocrat 1		This former GOP Presidential Candidate is noted for getting calls from God on his cell phone.	Eating roadkill.
Theocrat 2		This theocrat does not believe in evolution, only in “animals that he allows to live.”	Getting his back waxed, or fighting Kareen Abul Jabbar.

Good luck everyone! And may the best Scissorhead win!

Joseph promptly went to the Silver Surfer’s house to ask a few questions…

Scissorheads –

This upcoming weekend is the Blog Against Theocracy, our annual blogswarm where we post from Friday through Sunday (April 2-4) on all topics on the theme of separation between Church and State — we are for it.

The variations on the theme are many. This is not a bashing of religion – peeps can believe what they choose, however they choose — but it is a reminder that the Government should keep out of religion, and Religion should keep out of the government.

As always, the Blog Against Theocracy website will be the clearing house of all participants posts. Please read the details there.

If you do not have a blog and you would like to post something, let me know in the comments and I will make that happen here on Mock, Paper, Scissors — we’ve done this before, and I’m always glad to have Scissorheads participate. This blogswarm calls out for the incorrigible spitballers of the internet to take aim with smart, funny, and searing commentary.

The blogswarm is not sponsored by any organization, though several are beneficiaries when we have heightened awareness. If you are looking for issues, there are a few places I think are essential for research:

• Americans United for Separation of Church and State
• First Freedom First
• The American Civil Liberties Union

…er, Bing McGhandi of the ever-famous Happy Jihad’s House of Pancakes, that is!

It all started — as it always does — with the Xristian Xrazies at Answers in Genesis who have started some sort of interesting advertising campaign – well, read it for yourself:

And HJ, America’s Favorite Hypnotoad wants us to send him pictures of us standing on Bibles, unashamedly and uncomprimisingly. Ungrammatically will win you bonus points.

Bing standing on a Bible

This seems like an excellent moment to remind you that Blog Against Theocracy is coming up, April 2-4. Maybe we can include standing on our Bibles as part of that?

Our good friend and allie, The Rev. Barry Lynn, who is the executive director of Americans United for Separation of Church and State sent a note this morning asking that Mock, Paper, Scissors help him get the word out about his latest Op-Ed. I’ll give you a quick taste of it, and then you click the link and read the rest:

Why does President Barack Obama support a policy that lets a Baptist homeless shelter take tax dollars and then refuse to hire Jews, Hindus or nonbelievers to change the sheets or ladle out the morning oatmeal? Particularly when it violates a clear campaign promise.

In 2008, candidate Obama told an audience in Zanesville, Ohio, that he would make major changes in the way religious entities were funded. Under President George W. Bush’s “faith-based” program, government grants and contracts went to religious groups to provide social services, even when those groups insisted on discriminatory hiring practices — applicants could be denied federally funded jobs, based solely on religious affiliation or beliefs.

During his presidential campaign, Obama specifically promised that “if you get a federal grant, you can’t use that grant money to proselytize to the people you help and you can’t discriminate against them — or against the people you hire — on the basis of their religion.”

This sounded pretty unequivocal. But more than a year has gone by since Obama set up his Office of Faith Based and Neighborhood Partnerships, and no substantive policy has been changed, least of all discriminatory hiring.

I think that it is worth our while to note that the budget for The Office of Faith Based and Neighborhood Partnerships has doubled this year. Yes, twice as much money — our money — is going to religious organizations to discriminate against our fellow Americans. President Carebear has doubled what Chimpy gave the Xristian Xrazies.

I guess it is not a moment too soon to remind all Scissorheads that our annual Blog Against Theocracy is coming upon us Easter weekend, April 2-4. There will be more information forthcoming at the BAT website. Oh – and I am contributing graphic support again. Blue Gal and I have got a lot of fun things planned!

Scissorheads —

If you can spare a couple of minutes, our good friend and allie, the Rev. Barry Lynn, has a post up at HuffPo and needs some support in the comments. The gist of it is that President Carebear is continuing Chimpy McStagger’s disastrous funding of faith-based groups without any checks on how the money is being spent, no accountability, and of course all employment discrimination and proselytizing remain intact. That’s your tax dollars going to subsidize fat bastard Xristian Xrazies, who indirectly are using it against you.

Lynn, who is the head of my favorite advocacy group, Americans United for Separation of Church and State is trying to get the word out to progressives (if any exist at HuffPo) and needs our support. The Carebear’s fan boys over there never listen to the bad news about the ‘Bear. To keep the article high up on the page, they need comments.

Thanks for all you do!

Regards,

Tengrain

…what are you doing working as a lab tech?

Several Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia employees were fired for refusing to get the seasonal flu vaccine… “I am a Christian, and my religion prohibits me from receiving vaccines,” said Tyrika Cowlay, who was a lab technician.

Anyone else see a problem here? Someone who is working in a children’s hospital (children are at the highest risk for fatalities for getting the Killer Pig Death Flu) refuses to be immunized, thus endangering the kiddies.

Except for the Christian Science folks (the power of prayer to heal), I don’t know of any mainstream Xristian sects that do off the deep end about medicine. I suppose this person can explain why it is that she works in a hospital but does not believe in medicine, but right off the bat, methinks she is in the wrong field. Maybe she can find a faith healer or other snake handler to give her gainful employment.

Sadly, she will probably get a lot of evangelical support saying it is religious discrimination that she is fired for endangering the kids at the hospital, when truthfully she is unwilling or unfit to do the job.

But that’s the state of play with the Xristian Xrazies and their persecution complex.

(HT: SkinnyDennis who found it on Bad Astronomy)

Just as Chimpy thought that freedom meant you had a choice of stores to go to, Mooselini thinks that freedom means imposing her religious agenda onto an unsuspecting nation.

She is the American Taliban.

(Kos via The Aristocrats)

Yes, once again, Pat Robertson’s Christian Broadcasting Network is warning us about demonic candy (literally, demons in candy) to defile the youth of America on Halloween:

If this holiday is hallowed, whose service is it set apart for? The answer to that question is very easy—Lucifer’s!… [M]ost of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches! I do not buy candy during the Halloween season. Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference.

– Kimberly Daniels

Now before everyone goes non-linear about Xristian Xrazies, gotta check out what the Rev. Barry Lynn, executive director of Americans United for Separation of Church and State has to say, too:

I’ve heard of the devil being in the details, but to think he’s lurking inside a Snickers bar is a little too much. Pat Robertson has always peddled some scary stuff, but this is over the top.

I hate to see all of that candy go to waste. I wish Robertson would send it to me, because I’m throwing a Halloween party and could use it.

– The Rev. Barry W. Lynn

Betsy found this at The Friendly Atheist, but she would not post it herself, so all praise on this post must be addressed to Tex. And all blame goes to me. Those are the rules.

Xristians twist knickers:
Genesis with sex, blood, skin…
Eve’s nipples on show!

• Now everyone is going to be dragging crosses across country to avoid arrest warrants. (Star Tribune — Bachmann-the-Nut’s hometown paper!)
• Jewish veterans love being memorialized under a cross in the middle of the Mojave Desert, maintained by the US Government, Fat Tony. (Seattle Times)
• God hates gays, and you should too. So you should throw leaves in the air to deny gays’ rights in Washington. (Vimeo)

Check out this fine graphic (and map – roll your mouse over each person to see who they are, if you cannot guess) of the people who makes up the United States. And of course, there’s Jeebus: he wrote the Constitution, after all.

UPDATE: Be sure to check out the documents that have fallen on the ground!

Recently, we brought you the video of a banana-wielding Xristian Wingnut trying to seduce a bewildered looking Kirk Cameron (who is, frankly, bewildered by much of anything beyond two syllables).

I thought we were done with him then, but the forever-Mike-Seaver Xristian Xrazy is back in our faces trying to give away a Xristian-Xrazy-annotated copy of Darwin’s Origin of the Species to college kids on the 150th anniversary of the publication. He just wants to bring you the truth, like all good educators. Um, his truth anyway. OK a big fat lie. But he’s sincere about it. For an actor, that is.

You can tell Kirk is a professional actor by his clever gestures and his use of full face.

At any rate, clearly the child actor’s cheese has slipped off his cracker; his shelf-life has expired, his 15 minutes are up, (insert your own cliché here).

…according to our good friend, the Hypnotoad Bing McGhandi, the proprietor of Happy Jihad’s House of Pancakes, who runs a 24x7x365 blog against theocracy.

The evidence he links to is overwhelming and includes some dude who is going to marry an underaged sheep, I’m guessing in Montana, but what do I know about livestock and weddings?

Anyway, the link to the end of times is there, and that is where you should leave your comments, too.

Look who’s blowing?

The Smith-Cotton High School Tiger Pride Marching Band had a cute idea, to show the evolution of brass instruments from the 1960s onward in a familiar pictograph form of the ascent of man, with each ape carrying a different brass instrument, and under the apes the words “Brass Evolutions 2009.” They were selling the shirts, too, as a band fundraiser, when suddenly the Xristian Xrazies put a stop to it, claiming of all things, that the school band by depicting evolution (a scientific theory) was showing a religious viewpoint.

And the school gave in. Assistant Superintendent Brad Pollitt ordered the t-shirts returned.

The heathen Darwinians who offended the Xristian Xrazy parents were Assistant Band Director Brian Kloppenburg and Band Director Jordan Summers, who were suffering under the sound notion that a scientific theory was a perfectly appropriate image for a public school. Silly men, didn’t they realize that they are in Missouri?

Pollitt, trying to extricate himself from the hole that he was digging but instead dug himself in further: “If the shirts had said ‘Brass Resurrections’ and had a picture of Jesus on the cross, we would have done the same thing.” That’s good to know, but Darwin is a scientist, and Jesus (if he existed) is a religious figure.

So here we have it: the Public School Superintendent pulls the bands tee shirts (a $700 loss right there), and he accomplishes the very thing that the parents complained about: he allowed the Xristian Fundamentalists’ religious world views to shape a school decision. And my guess, is that he also empowered them to do more now that they have a success under their (chastity) belts.

But here’s my favorite quote in the article – which just sums it all up:

I don’t think evolution should be associated with our school.

– Band parent Sherry Melby

Trust, us, Sherry, after this, it won’t be.

(Hat tip: TexBetsy)

Our good Amphibian friend, the ever analytical Bing McGhandi of Happy Jihad’s House of Pancakes fame (which is essential reading for those of you who want to know what the Xristian Xraxies are up to, and how to debunk their nuttery; he’s a one-frog blog against theocracy), has a post up that I think is important.

You see, the Nutters are back with the World-wide Jewish Conspiracy. Bing thinks we ought to know about what they are saying:

“Jews are behind a plan for global conquest”
“Jews work through Masonic Lodges.”
“Jews use liberalism to weaken church and state.”
“Jews control the press”
“Jews work through radicals and revolutionaries.”
“Jews manipulate the economy, especially through banking monopolies and the power of gold.”
“Jews issue paper currency not tied to the gold standard.”
“Jews promote financial speculation and use of credit.”
“Jews replace traditional educational curriculum to discourage independent thinking.”
“Jews encourage immorality among Christian youth.”
“Jews use intellectuals to confuse people.”
“Jews control puppet governments through secret alliances and blackmailing public officials.”
“Jews weaken laws through liberal interpretations.”
“Jews will suspend civil liberties during an emergency and then make the measures permanent.”

Bing, as always, is right. Please go to his blog and read the whole thing – yes it is long, but you need to see what is up. It’s not pretty.

Podcast audio version click here.

Bing’s post click here.

On occasion, when Americans talk about freedom, we talk about how students in other cultures are taught a very whitewashed view of history.  It’s no big secret that some of what’s taught at younger grades about the greatness and honesty of the founding fathers is simplified, and that some of their deeds are glorified and others ignored.  But Texas seems to be taking it a step further.

From yesterday’s Houston Chronicle:

Social studies books turning a controversial new page

from HoustonChronicle

Some proposed curriculum changes, which will be discussed by a state board this week, are sure to inflame Texans.

AUSTIN — Biographies of Washington, Lincoln, Stephen F. Austin? Not fit reading material for children in the early grades.

Cesar Chavez? Not worthy of his role-model status.

Christianity? Emphasize its importance.

Such suggestions are part of efforts to rewrite history books for the state’s schoolchildren, producing some expert recommendations that are sure to inflame Texans, no matter their political leanings.

The State Board of Education expects to start discussing new social studies curriculum standards this week, with members of the public getting their first opportunity to speak this fall and a final board vote next spring.

The process is a long one with lasting impact: reshaping the social studies curriculum, including history, for 4.7 million Texas public school children.

But of course Washington and Lincoln are to be left in, right?  Especially as we celebrate Presidents’ Day in February, right??

(more…)

Feel free to pray in your home, in your synagogues, your churches, your temples or your mosques. Feel free to not pray. Feel free to speak out about atheism or agnosticism or religion. Enjoy your first amendment rights.

But please, please, please, do NOT mix prayer and government.

Nicole Sandler of Air America offers this:

In my view, religion has no place in four of those seven “centers of power.” So, today, in the privacy of my own home, I’ll pray that you people who want to insinuate your own ideas of morality on the rest of us keep your church and religious beliefs out of my government, military, media and educations.

(more…)

US religious Right concedes defeat.

America’s religious Right has conceded that the election of US President Barack Obama has sealed its defeat in the cultural war with permissiveness and secularism.

Leading evangelicals have admitted that their association with George W. Bush has not only hurt the cause of social conservatives but contributed to the failure of the key objectives of their 30-year struggle.

Many thanks to Lea for cross-posting this!

—TexBetsy

(Scissorhead LiberaldemDave took the bait and rose to the challenge when we emailed back and forth earlier this week. And I’m glad he did – this is an extraordinary post. Rgds, T.G.)

1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms, just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

This tongue-in-cheek list has been clogging teh intertoobs for several years now. I found a linky to a posting going back to 1995.

I recently shared this with a blog-friend. The response I got back was “this is great and would make a great starting point for a Blog Against Theocracy piece”. Immediately, I began to suffer from performance anxiety. It’s really easy to snark and blog anonymously, but now I was being asked to actually share two things that I take VERY seriously: my Christian faith AND my desire to have full civil marriage equality. This anxiety has been magnified by the brilliant pieces that have been shared at Blog Against Theocracy and Mock, Paper, Scissors.

So, without further ado, I will attempt to put some pithiness on this Top 10 List that actually stands alone by itself, thank you very much.

My life is very similar to the chicken vs. egg conundrum. Was I a Christian before I identified as gay or vice versa? After 23+/- years of self-loathing, I (like so many other gay people of faith) decided it was impossible to be both gay AND Christian. So, also like so many others, I turned my back on my upbringing, my family, and in the process, my faith…All with disastrous side effects. If I had been taught to embrace my true self AND my faith, where would I be today? Would I have lived the lifestyle in all its debauchery and good times of the 1980’s and early ‘90’s?

Ironically, for me, it was being diagnosed with HIV/AIDS on (get this) Valentine’s Day, 1995, with a t-cell count of 2 and weighing a whopping 110 pounds that led me back to the values I thought I couldn’t reconcile and keep my sanity. The doctor gave me a generous 30 days to get my affairs in order and prepare to die. Well, if that won’t wake a man up I don’t know what will. 1995 was a bell weather year. That year has been catalogued in a daily journal.

Fast forward to the election cycle of 2004: By this time, my health had become stable and I found myself passionately involved in Democratic Party politics, elected to serve as a Precinct Chairman in my little uber-Red rural county. Irony has always played a major role in my life and politics, as it turns out, and I could have never predicted that my involvement in the Democratic Party would lead me back to a faith-based personal life…but it did. As it turns out, the most fertile breeding ground in my Precinct for finding and cultivating Democratic voters was our local African American Missionary Baptist Church. With major trepidation, I invited my equally Caucasian County Chair to attend services with me to encourage people to register to vote. That fateful Sunday, my up-to-this-point comfortable gay, partnered life was turned on its ear. Call it an epiphany. Call it Kismet. Call it a connection to another community that has, historically, struggled with their civil rights and equal protection under the law. Whatever it’s called, it has changed both my life and my politics.

I’ve been monogamously partnered for over 15 years now. Never once did I ever feel the need for any recognition of my relationship. Just having a mate was satisfying enough. Heck, I was even on that “don’t call it marriage” bandwagon for a while. My thinking was that as long as my community got its rights, they could call it a Dixie Cup for all I cared. But then I started evolving…again. More and more, semantics started to really matter to me. The louder the Xristian Xrazies started yelling, the deeper I found my heels digging into the dirt. The more they tried to equate my very settled life with my partner as something evil and dirty, the angrier I became. Once again, I was transported back to the period of my life when I came to terms with my sexuality. All the anger, resentment and bitterness came boiling back to the surface. I found myself rekindling the anger I felt for my fundamentalist sister (who I have affectionately renamed Jeebus in a skirt). There was a hole in my heart for the nieces and nephews and great-nieces and nephews that would never know their uncle as anything but that “dirty homo”.

Bigotry cloaked in religion is wrong and it’s anything but Christian.

When I have this discussion with my straight friends of faith, I always point them to the Sermon on the Mount. I find it fascinating that most Christians put more weight in a couple of obtuse references to same-sex couples by St. Paul than they do in the collective words that Christ, himself, had to say on the subject. In case any of you are wondering, that would be ZERO. ZILCH. NADA. If, indeed, the very foundation of society and the Church were threatened by people of the same gender loving one another, wouldn’t logic dictate that Jesus would have had at least made a passing reference to same-sex coupling? Nobody said the fundies that drape their religion in the American flag think logically. My bad for not picking up on that sooner.

For all these reasons, I’m more committed than ever to the separation of Church and State. For me, both play very important roles in my daily life. That doesn’t, however, mean that they need to intersect…EVER…ANY WHERE. If that’s so clear to this gay, Christian, partnered man, why is it so difficult for those who would use religion for politics to see? Until I can answer that question, I will continue to be ever diligent, ever outspoken, ever…

liberaldemdave

(This post comes to us from our great friend and Scissorhead Jimmy Dean’s Fucked-up Cousin Clyde. JD’s etc. has been a long time supporter of the Blog Against Theocracy and always contributes a thought-provoking and creative post. He did it again for us in 2009! Rgds, T.G.)

Who rules in religion?

The God or Gods do.

God is The ruler. And the people are subservient to God’s laws.

Most religions follow this template. Granted, spiritualism has as many manifestations as possibly there are devotees, so there is not only one pattern which describes all, but… most organized religions follow this basic one of God the Ruling Force Of The Universe, God The Superior, Man Inferior (this is not a sexual position, unless you count the Missionary One, then . . . maybe, but probably only in the context of a patriarchy), God The All Powerful, etc.

God, as we understand the philosophical entity, may exist in either a state of formlessness—-an omnipresent Spirit, at once the eternal background matrix for all arising manifestations in the material world and equally distinct from those manifestations much as the sky is only a canvas (green screen, modern parlance) for the movie of the clouds, or as the existent manifestations themselves —-inseparably creation itself, in every form imaginable.

God as the ruler is either then a remote lawgiver, one beautifully likened in 16th Century-think to the clockmaker who has built the clock and who winds it but who is also busy with other projects somewhere else in the shop, or the craftsman and the clock and the shop and the winding all in a package.

There is a wee problem here.

IF God is remotely a creator, then the physical laws are ones pertinent to the creation. Indeed, this has been the explorational busy work of the physicists and chemists and mathematicians as long as we know such thinkers to have existed. The discovery of these laws and the refinement of the search to the least minutiae goes on at this moment. These boundary-defining statutes establish what can and cannot occur. Since they apply to the physical material realm they lend themselves to testing and proofs. Bit by bit, these laws are being revealed to man.

But IF God is the creation itself, everything changes. It is no longer simply a discovery of the laws by which creation manifests, but the creation itself revealing itself to itself, God singing “Getting To Know Me.”

The wee problem is this:

Laws created by politicians are not laws governing the material workings of the cosmos. (I will acknowledge that the State policeman with the radar gun who is waving at me as I sail past him at 75 in a 55 zone does have a beatific appearance . . . but maybe it is only oxygen deprivation since I stopped breathing when I saw him too late).

They are not laws governing physics, but people’s actions. And they are not God’s laws, but laws of people, issued by people, for people. God doesn’t make these laws anymore than people make the laws of electromagnetism.

But this is not clear to everyone.

Let me say it again: people make the laws governing people, and God makes the laws governing the physical universe.

Let me flip this one more time so it is painfully clear how wrong it is when Believers become (rulers) legislators and confuse who and what they are:

• GOD makes the laws governing people,
  and PEOPLE make the laws governing the physical universe.
• GOD says who can vote,
  and PEOPLE say what gravity ought to be.
• GOD says what tariffs there should be on foreign steel,
  and PEOPLE say what the binding force between water molecules should be.
• GOD says who can marry,
  and PEOPLE say what ultraviolet radiation should be.
• GOD says how much the states can tax the use of tobacco,
  and PEOPLE say how galaxies rotate about an axis.
• GOD says what boundaries exist between adjoining nations,
  and People allow a plant to grow from a seed.
• GOD says what the speed limit in rural Ohio should be,
  and PEOPLE say how fast or how slow universe expansion should be.

When God and people become used interchangeably, it’s a theocracy, or rule by GOD/PEOPLE, and the limits separating religion and government no longer exist.

No longer is it clear what laws are laws affecting the physical workings of the universe, and what laws are laws made by people affecting other people.

No longer clear is it what belief is, and what knowledge is.

The boundaries between science and dogma become hazy and uncertain.

No one knows what’s real, and what isn’t. And the rulers can justify anything they do, with the claim they have the divine right.

Rulers love this.

Tengrain — and if you think I was going to put my usual signature somewhere in those four quadrants, you’re crazier than I am!

In my line of work, we get these sorts of “magic quadrant” analysis of where our products are compared to the competition. Some people find them useful.

UPDATE: According to Theocracy Watch, the theocratic governments of the world are Israel, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Vatican City.

I know, I know, I know… but imagine if the news shows filled up a few minutes here and there with sightings of Mohammed, or Buddah. Why is it always Jesus’ image on the stain in the news?

You see, it’s not just the three branches of government we need to be vigilant about, the fourth estate is already well on the way to being a theocratic media.

Via email, I’ve been asked to explain myself, how I could “perverse” such an iconic image as the Rosenthal photograph of the planting of the flag on Iwo Jima. The writer suggest a few things I could do with the flag pole, but I’ll save that for another time.

When Blue Gal and I were plotting and planning this year’s blog swarm, she asked me to do something with the Rainbow Flag. We agreed that this year, the theocrats were targeting gays, what with fights all over the country on same sex marriage, and gay civil rights in general. One of us said it was like a war on gays.

And then the image dawned on me. You see, the Marines who fought so bravely in the South Pacific in World War II (Hi Dad!) fought for all of us, not just some of us. Their heroism is not limited to just one group of Americans over another group. They did not fight and die to preserve and protect the US Constitution only to have theocrats come in and destroy it in the name of their god.

So here’s the way I see things: just as the Marines fought for all of us, we have to fight to preserve and protect our Constitution from the theocrats who would replace it with a Bible, and we have to fight for all of our citizens to be equal. Religion has no place in our governance.

Regards,

Tengrain