Allegedly, Gawker got their hands on Politico’s memo on what to ask celebrities at the White House Correspondent’s Dinner. This is either authentic or the best prank ever. The questions are so obsequious and idiotic that I think that they must have come from them.
If you read it, be prepared for some second-hand shame to envelope you, and as Pierce would say, “Prestone, my good man.”
Death of the Media
Politico’s Dylan Byers wants to know what is taking the Boston Bombing investigation sooooo long:
It’s been more than 24 hours since the explosions in Boston. But while new details emerge by the hour, the question on so many people’s minds remains unanswered: Who did it?
For many journalists I’ve spoken with today, this ignorance is tortuous. The identification of the attacker(s) and the reasons for the attack will likely have enormous political (and potentially geoplitical [sic]) ramifications, which will vary greatly depending on whether the attacker(s) is domestic or foreign, acting alone or as part of an organization. We’re standing on the verge of a very important national conversation about something, and we have no idea what it is.
Yes, sonny-boy, it is all about you and winning the morning. And besides, I thought Politico’s stock-in-trade was having national conversations about something, and having no idea what it is about.
Jeebus, some people!
You know, when Geaorgia
cracker Senator Saxby Chambliss made his non-support of marriage equality–”I’m not gay so I’m not going to marry one”–it sounded a lot like a form statement.
So, for 1/15 of a point towards your final grade, fill in the blank:
“I’m not ____________________, so I’m not going to ___________ one.”
In the comments, #2 lead pencil only. Bonus point if you respond in the original German.
Tiger Beat on the Potomac (Thanks Charlie!) has yet another unsourced, breathless and gossipy article on how the GOP is rebranding itself via Fox:
Republicans and Fox News are moving to purge the controversial political creatures they created.
Both were damaged badly in 2012 by loud, partisan voices that stoked the base — but that scared the hell out of many voters. Now, the GOP, with its dismal image, and Fox News, with its depressed ratings in January, are scrambling to dim those voices. To wit:
- Fox ousted contributors Sarah Palin and Dick Morris, two of the most obnoxiously partisan figures on the network’s air.
- Karl Rove, himself sidelined by Fox after the election, has helped start a new super PAC, the Conservative Victory Fund, designed to keep controversial conservatives like Rep. Steve King (R-Iowa) from winning Senate primaries.
- Senate GOP leaders created what amounts to a buddy system with their caucus’s most popular tea party members, Sens. Rand Paul of Kentucky and Ted Cruz of Texas, to get their help in taming anti-establishment conservatives.
- Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal has been running around the country warning anyone who will listen that Republicans must quit being the “stupid party” that nominates nutty candidates.
But as in every Politico (who are fluffers for the gelatinous Roger Ailes, let us not forget), there is always the Tell:
One high-profile Republican strategist, who refused to be named in order to avoid inflaming the very segments of the party he wants to silence, said there is a deliberate effort by party leaders to “marginalize the cranks, haters and bigots — there’s a lot of underbrush that has to be cleaned out.”
…which of course is the patented way in which to marginalize cranks: refuse to have your name attached to your criticism. Boy, that’ll learn ‘em up good!
We’ve been saying this for a long time, since before the 2012 Goat Rodeo in fact: it’s not the presentation, it’s the policies, it is Republicanism itself that is the problem. Wingnuttia seems to think if they could just find the Magic Dog Whistle, they could get the rest of the country to back them. You can redesign the cereal box, but if what you are selling is Rat Poison, no one is going to buy it.
Anyway, it is an amazing fantasy of an article from Tiger Beat, full of bluster and non-attributed sources, signifying absolutely nothing. But read it and be amazed at how it sucks up to Ailes while trying to sound indie. My 7th grade journalism teacher is probably having a good laugh over it because even her charges could do better than this.